OZOi News

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From the bulletins

Real headlines in our bulletins

Full source log →

Somebody else did the journalism. Each link goes to the outlet that reported it.

  1. Google TrendsTrending: stefanos tsitsipasWhat Australia's Googling ·
  2. InnovationAusNew cyberattack on supermarket fridges sweeps across EuropeThe Desk ·
  3. ABC NewsRising costs approaching 'scary' levels for home ownersThe Desk ·
  4. The Hollywood ReporterVersant Earnings Best Estimates in Quarter of Fandango, MS NOW ExpansionThe Red Rug ·
  5. VarietyVersant Sees Q3 Profit Drop Despite Upticks in Non-TV OperationsThe Red Rug ·
  6. DeadlineBritish Independent Film Awards: ‘Elsinore’ Leads NominationsThe Red Rug ·
  7. The AdvocateCash rate hits 18-year high after fifth increase of the yearThe Number Crunch ·
  8. CrikeyOf course One Nation’s policies for Victoria don’t add up. It’s a scam, not a political partyThe Number Crunch ·

What this is

Real headlines. Fictional presenters. Fair dinkum.

  • The headlines are real

    Every story comes from an Australian news outlet, and we say which one, on air and on this site. They did the journalism. We just read it out.

  • The presenters are not

    They are drawings with synthetic voices, written by an AI model. None of them is, or is based on, a real person. They are aware of this and have opinions about the line work.

  • It is comedy, not reporting

    The jokes are about the presenters and their very small studio, never about the people in the news. Nothing here is financial, legal or medical advice.

Coming up

Next on the roster

Full schedule →

The Shed

Meet the 15 people who are not people

All presenters →

Fictional illustrated characters. They are not real journalists and claim no credentials.

  • Mara Ellery

    Lead anchor

    Thirty years in the lead chair. It squeaks. She knows who touched it.

    The desk, in the chair

  • Anika Vale

    Money, technology and explainers

    Has read the article, the footnotes and your mind. Just to be precise.

    The desk, in the other chair. For now.

  • Tess Okafor

    Field reporter

    Live from the scene. Not sure which scene.

    A car park, a paddock, a country show. It varies.

  • Kai Mercer

    Morning host and regional desk

    Cheerful at an hour nobody should be. Never takes the hat off.

    Morning studio, and leaning on a fence

  • Felix Rowan

    Sport host

    Has lost his sunglasses. They are on his head. Nobody tells him.

    Sports desk, mostly standing

  • Ruben Tavita

    Sport co-host

    Defends the mullet as aerodynamic.

    Sports desk, sitting on Felix if required

  • June Halloran

    Weather

    Does not do predictions. Does forecasts. Take a jumper.

    The weather wall

  • Dev Narayan

    Money desk

    Reads the fine print so you do not have to, then tells you it was on page forty.

    Money desk

  • Harriet Lowe

    Regions correspondent, Tasmania

    Has not been warm since a date she will not specify.

    A ferry queue, usually

  • Sam Birch

    Overnight desk

    Awake so you can sleep. Talks to the mug.

    Overnight desk

  • Nell Hartigan

    Night desk

    Wide awake at three in the morning. Toastie on the go.

    Overnight desk, next to Sam

  • Lina Kowalczyk

    World desk

    Keeps a list of places Felix has confused. It has a second page.

    World desk, map open

  • Noah Bright

    Culture and screens

    No spoilers, but. He has thoughts.

    Culture desk

  • Gus Marlin

    Roving reporter, coast

    At war with one specific seagull, whom he has named Gary.

    A beach, a boat ramp, a caravan park

  • Rusty Doyle

    Roving reporter, bush

    It is always swooping season where Rusty is.

    A paddock, a shed, a servo car park